so tonight i've had the unfortunate realization that in the four and a half years that i've been together with my boyfriend - he doesn't listen to me or understand why i get annoyed with him when he doesn't clue me in on his life when he expects me to do the same for him.
almost everyday, at the end of the day; my boyfriend asks me how my workday went. if something happened that was interesting or funny, i'd share it with him. but yet, when i ask him the same thing; i get the vaguest answers. however, when we're out with friends and they ask him the same questions he'll tell them about what he's up to with his clients, what he's working on, and what's he's sold to them. wtf??? so why do i have to share everything and he doesn't?
what gets to me is that he goes on and on and on and FUCKING on about how we're in a partnership and how its about communication and how important it is that we share everything with each other. clearly what that he really means is that i have share everything and he doesn't.
tonight i had a callback from LV about a position that LITERALLY just came available earlier in the day. the HR woman called me to see if i was still interested in working at LV and if i could meet with the store director. those were the only thing we talked about. again, position just becoming available and if i would be interested. that's it. we didn't talk about pay and we didn't talk about the actual responsibilities that that role would encompass. but of course the boyfriend had to play 20 questions with me even though i told him that i didn't know anything else other than a position just came up and if i was interested in it.
i told him politely, but admittedly tersely, not ask all these questions until i knew more myself of what this all meant. he had the nerve to get annoyed with me about not telling him anything even though literally 30 minutes beforehand, he was telling our friends about artwork he had sold in NY to clients that i had no clue he was working on. he also told the same friends about a webcast project that he was working on with some investors and how low the fee was that they were offering to pay him for his time. i wish i had known that he had heard back from them already on what his financial compensation was......
sooooooo, again - WTF? don't i have a right to be just as annoyed? the fact that the person that i'm living with can't tell me about what he's working on but has no qualms about sharing that information with EVERYONE else? the thing that really gets me is that this is not an isolated one-off case. this is something that he's done to me for the past four and a half years. it scares me that i have no clue if he's being genuinely oblivious to how hypocritical it is or if he's doing it on purpose.
to top it off, as we were climbing up the stairs tonight to enter our apt - he's telling me about a tree growing in the gutter that's been the source of all these water leaks that we've been having in our stairwell whenever it rains. so i guess in his eyes, i had stupidly said, "so there's a tree growing on the roof?" this is how the conversation went after my blatantly retarded comment:
"no, its not on the roof, it's in the gutter."
"but......isn't a gutter usually on the roof?"
"yes, of course a gutter is on the roof."
"sooooo, if a gutter is on the roof, wouldn't the tree that's growing out of the gutter be on the roof?"
"no, its in the gutter. oh, by the way, when i told paul our landlord about what happened, he said 'great, so there's a roof garden up there now is there?'.........."
again, WTF???? why is it when i say that there's a tree on the roof, i'm being dismissed, but when someone else says it, its valid? i'm sorry, but to me that means that my boyfriend does not listen to me and could care less about actually comprehending the words coming out of my mouth.
not cool, and honestly i don't know what to do. i already have a boss that does that to me at work. i DON'T need it in my personal life as well.
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